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Hem and Haw

Absolute maybe.

Dear Word Detective: Where did the expression “to hem and haw” come from? I have also heard it “to him and haw.” Either way, please clarify its meaning and origin. — Mark Anderson.

Well, which is it? “Hem and haw” or “him and haw”? Or is it “hum and hoo”? Ever heard the expression “hish and horp”? Me neither. But it would really help if you would pick one question and stick to it. Then again, wasn’t it T.S. Eliot who said “The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity”? Truer words were never spoken. Unless they were spoken by W.B. Yeats, which, come to think of it, they were. Golly, this being certain business is hard.

Which is, of course, where “hem and haw” (the usual form) comes in. Depending on one’s point of view, when you are “hemming and hawing,” you are either dithering and refusing to give a definite answer, or simply (as the politicians say) “keeping your options open.”

For a species known for its willingness to leap before looking, humanity has a remarkably long history of “hemming and hawing.” The phrase in that form first appeared in the late 18th century (“I hemmed and hawed … but the Queen stopped reading,” 1786), but other forms (“hem and hawk,” “hum and haw,” etc.) are a few centuries older, and the “hem” and the “haw” are both considerably older than the whole phrase.

The basic meaning of “hem,” according to the Oxford English Dictionary (OED), is “an interjectional utterance like a slight half cough, used to attract attention, give warning, or express doubt or hesitation.” If this sounds vaguely familiar, that’s because it is the same sound depicted by the interjection “ahem,” the difference being that “ahem” is an actual word used to attract attention to the speaker, rather than producing the sound “hem” itself. One uses “ahem” in situations where, for instance, making noises with one’s throat might be either rude or ineffective. The verb “to hem,” meaning to make the noise, dates to the 15th century, and is “echoic” in origin, being an imitation of the sound itself. “Hem” is also closely related to “hum,” also echoic.

“Haw,” which dates back to the 1600s, is another case of a word imitating a sound, in this case “as an expression of hesitation” (OED). There are fashions in such things, and today we are more likely to say “uh,” “huh,” or “um” when faced with a sudden decision, but the feeling is the same.

So, put together, “hem and haw” vividly describes that moment when our mouth stalls for time while our mind attempts to assess the ramifications of our possible answers, the mental “looking” before the verbal “leaping.” And while it’s annoying to ask a question and be answered with “hemming and hawing,” there’s an argument to be made that the world could do with a little less instant certainty.

13 comments to Hem and Haw

  • Rev. B. R. Jones

    Your site was so helpful!!! I thought the expression I looked up was some colloquialism from my neck of the woods in East Texas. I will probably be back… soon!

  • JILL KELSEY

    I love your site, and am in awe of how you find out the answers to such obscure info. My mother and father, both born in 1910, and of low income, low education working class families, had very good vocabularies, and it makes me wonder how they learned to speak so well. Hemming and hawing was an expression used occassionally in our home, and I had no troubles Googling it, finding your site, and finding out exactly what I wanted to know. Dad was German, and Mom was Swiss/German. Dad finished 8th grade and Mom, one year of high school.

  • Joy Fisher

    How old is the phrase “truer words were never spoken”?

  • Norbert

    According to my mother, in Germany when you finished the first grade it was expected that you could read the newspaper. After the 8th grade you either start as an apprentice to learn a trade (can include class instruction), go to a middle school (equivalent to a 2 year college) or go to the “Uni”. My mom stated working at 16 in the Post Office in Nuremberg and her German, along with her English vocabulary, is still pretty good at 88.

    People seem to think education and intelligence are synonymous. Do a Google search of ‘what 8th-graders were expected to know in 1910′ in the U.S. – you may be a little surprised.

  • JH

    obama ‘hems’ quite a bit.

  • A wonderfully witty and helpful answer. Thanks!

  • FAJUGBAGBE Stephen Adeniyi

    I like your analysis.

  • Julie Shaw

    Well that was fun.

  • Marsha

    My old grandpappy said it was from the “go left” and “go right” commands given to working mules (but I don’t remember which way was ‘hem’ and which was ‘haw’.)

  • Milton

    It’s probably from left to right given that in all western languages, sentences are written and read from left to right. Of course, the obvious is that the ‘haw’ comes first. First =left.

  • Holly

    Imagine being surrounded by a hedge and only being able to make left turns. You’d be going around in circles.
    Most hems on your clothing circle the body. A Haw is a left hand turn (instruction to mules). So to hem and haw is to go round and round without accomplishing anything.

  • Minnie Hull

    I’m old enough to have heard Hem haw all the time. Now my supposed boyfriend is giving new meaning to the words.

  • HRH Prince Padraig, Duke of New York

    Meanwhile the phrase used in Britain is ‘Umming and Arring’

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